The sky was grey when they left the restaurant, food neatly packed up in plastic containers (even more for his tupperware collection; you can never have too many). No drinks this time for him despite the edge of summer approaching ever closer. Tomás knew exactly how much money was in the bank and he couldn’t afford another extraneous purchase. The rising humidity made it uncomfortable to wear his windbreaker, but he would feel more exposed if he didn’t have it on. He hoped that 40% chance of rain wouldn’t come to fruition.
They wandered around the college town, where they spent the past four years or so honing their skills in whatever specialized field they chose to serve the country’s post office. Theirs was comparably small, not as vast as Errantia or as prolific as Liming, but their own little post office served them well. Sandwiched between the Raison and the Vang rivers, both leading out to the Southern Sea, they specialized not in dispatching, but in package processing. Tomás wished he knew where his specialty laid. Yes, he may be on the precipice of graduating with a degree in legal studies but did he actually want to be a lawyer?
That was a question for another time, but Ada didn’t think so.
“You can become a Postal Inspector. My boss’s brother’s husband works as one,” she continued, as they settled onto a park bench. The overcast dulled her usual bright strawberry-blonde hair into more of a brown.
“…Your what?” Tomás said, incredulously.
“My boss’s brother’s husband,” she repeated, as if that was supposed to clear up anything. She waved her fork, stabbed into half of a pickle, up and down with each word, as Tomás tried to thread her words together. “I never met him, but I met the brother and he’s a pretty nice guy with a seemingly sound mind. I’m sure he wouldn’t marry someone who wouldn’t be fit for the job.”
“Are you telling me that I should be an inspector or are you telling me I’m not insane?”
“I’m simply telling you that it is an option.”
Tomás sunk in his seat. “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I should’ve sucked up to one of the instructors. Maybe I wouldn’t be floundering around as much.”
“Are you implying that I sucked up to Dr. Ardelean?” She stared at him owlishly. “Just because I did better than you in that class?”
“What? I’m not implying anything. You’re great! I’ve already accepted defeat that I can’t match your skills in…in…,” he trailed off, suddenly forgetting what the class was about. It was where they first met, and where he learned about - oh right that was it!
“…substance compatibility in packaging,” he finished.
Ada covered her mouth with the back of her hand as her body shook with laughter. “Was the class that traumatizing?”
“I would like to see you ace all my law courses.”
“Reading those dusty things? I rather not.” She wrinkled her nose; Tomás remembered that she sneezed so much while helping him look for his books in the library and how the librarian threatened to kick them both out for disturbing the peace. “Why take a gap year and have no direction when you could just go straight to law school? Why even take a gap year?”
“I think I just need a break.” He closed his eyes briefly and fluttered them open. The rolling storm steadily approached them, but it was still a ways off until it would reach them. “I’m not planning to be great… just good enough.”
“Oh, please. You’re not trying to map the realms of death.” Ada took another bite from her sandwich. The tomato was slipping out from the other side. Tomás wanted to push it back into the bread with his finger. “Isn’t it kinda thrilling to make a name for yourself?”
He snorted. “For you, maybe. My ultimate goal in life is to prevent as many lawsuits as possible against our country’s office. I think it’s a noble enough cause.”
Ada shrugged. “If you’re going for nobility, you can always work as a regular postknight in the meantime and start with domestic deliveries. You took all the required courses to be qualified as one. If you stick with domestic, you don’t have to worry about all the complications that comes with going elsewhere.” She scrunched her eyebrows, remembering the required introductory combat training course for every person who wanted to work for the post. “You cannot pay me enough money to rough it out in the wild.”
“Is following established paths really the wild though?” Tomás took a bite of his sandwich, wiping the crumbs from his mouth with his sleeve. “If you were really afraid, you could always hire a knight.”
“The only knight that I would want to be by my side is you.”
Tomás turned red and swiveled his head away from her teasing expression; he was desperate to change the subject for the thought of confronting the arduous task of defining their relationship made him queasy. “You’re so annoying. Besides, how am I going to protect you when you’re tucked away in a building?”
“There’s danger around every corner!”
“Knights, much less postknights aren’t allowed in buildings. If there is danger around every corner in a laboratory, then I think you’re due for a Safety and Inspection audit!”
“I assure you that the ‘inspection’ part of the Safety and Inspection Division is up to code.”
“…Didn’t your boss get arrested for murdering somebody?”
Ada put her fist to her palm, almost knocking over the cup of iced tea she bought. “Allegedly. They never found actual evidence convicting him of the act. I don’t know if they actually found the true killer. It’s not my problem, anyways. I’m just a lab assistant. The whole thing caused a big upset in the building. Dr. Meitner was fuming when she found out that Ardelean wasn’t convicted.”
Tomás was vaguely aware of all the things happening with her job and he was hyper aware that she wasn’t supposed to be saying them so casually to him. Meitner was an apparent academic rival of Ada’s boss; accomplished in her own right in biology, but the both of them were vying for a tenured professorship. Besides, it wasn’t like he didn’t blather about the drama happening at his current position as an assistant archivist at the library.
Their home, Alucina, was incredibly small. An island adrift between two rivers, between two different continents. His employer was actually romantically involved with Ada’s boss’s brother. Everyone, in one way or another, knew everyone else.
He rather just be a face in the crowd. With any luck from Lady Stella Maris, he would be able to move into a bigger town and start anew. Ada too, had expressed her interest in moving but for the exact opposite reason.
In any case, as long as everything remained just between the two of them, then it should be fine, right?
“Are you sure you aren’t recounting a soap opera and not a professional workplace?”
“Oh, absolutely. You have no idea what kind of schemes are brewing over there. Even I don’t either. There’s only so much eavesdropping I can do.” She shook her head. “The only reason why a package is going to blow up is because two people are going to blow up at each other and not notice that something is about to explode!”
“For your sake, I hope that doesn’t happen.”
He took a sip from his water bottle, suppressing the grimace that immediately followed if something were to happen to Ada. He really wouldn’t know what to do with himself if she wasn’t in his life anymore. It was a rather extreme thought. He was convinced he was in love with her; whether she felt the same way about him was yet to be seen, but they have all the time in the world, until Ada decided to change course for the stars that is. That was inevitable. But right now, they were eating lunch. The future will have to wait until they were done.
They continued eating their lunch, chatting about whatever possessed their minds, and was only interrupted with the rumbling of thunder. The dark grey clouds rolled over them, yet the sun still shone its golden hue onto the ground a distance away; the surrounding area created a valley of shadow cradling the sunlit field. If he squinted, he could see the tallest spire of the Stella Maris Cathedral peaking past the cloudscape - one of the few attractions here.
The story went that Our Lady Stella Maris had conflict with her sister, Errantia’s Lady of Reason. Stella Maris fell in love with a mortal man and had a son, but the son was stillborn. The Lady of Reason, angry with her sister that she made such a foolish decision, admonished Stella Maris, forcing the goddess to flee her homeland. Stella Maris marooned herself in the rivers between two countries, and the tears she shed for her dead child crystallized into the island of Alucina.
To Tomás, it was just a story, told in stained glass when his parents used to force him to attend worship services. He knew that in other countries, their gods played a more active role in their people’s lives, but not for Alucina and Errantia. The sister patron goddesses haven’t made their presence known for a long time.
It took a while before the storm clouds made their way to the town. By then, they had moved on to discussing current events, principally the Underworld Expeditions. Alucina was too small to send a few of their populace down to the Afterlife. Besides, with theirs and Errantia’s religions being closely intertwined, there was no reason to have a whole separate group.
“You know my friend Kurt, right?” Ada said. “Meitner’s lab assistant?”
He had no idea who Kurt was. She had a habit of introducing people that he hadn’t met yet, but it was partially his fault too. If he didn’t see said person every day for two weeks straight, then he would have no idea who they were. For the sake of conversation, however, he replied: “Yes. What about him?”
Her eyes widened. “Well, he told me that Meitner has been acting antsy all this week. He hasn’t had much of anything to do because she’s been obsessively watching the news. He thinks it’s because of the expeditions, but he’s pretty sure that she doesn’t know the people who are representing Errantia.”
“Well, what’s wrong with her then?”
“I don’t know! Ardelean has taken noticed of this behavior too and counts it as a win in his eyes.”
“Ada,” Tomás said firmly, “why are all the people you work with sound insane?”
“I mean, if you stick a bunch of weird shut-ins, each passionate about a different specific topic, in a poorly funded institution…”
“I… understand. I think.”
Her description reminded him of his own department of legal studies. The number of times he was locked in a library study room with his classmates, each and every one of them studying a different branch of law, and heard the most insane opinions about the most mundane topics ever committed to ear.
He didn’t think lesser of them. In fact, he’s said some weird stuff too. Well, mostly to Ada but she didn’t seem to mind.
“I’m glad!” she beamed. “I feel bad for Meitner honestly… but I think this just means that I can probably get a slight pay raise with tenure coming up!”
He opened his mouth to respond but felt something wet on his nose. Instinctively, he looked up into the sky and stared owlishly at it. Ada did the same, swiping several droplets from her cheek in one go.
Neither of them moved from the bench as the first few droplets fell, until it started pouring - then the sprint was on. They threw their belongings together in their bags and their remaining food into the trash can.
Tomás threw his coat over the both of them, but the coat wasn’t enough; the rain still seeped through. They were drenched within seconds. If it wasn’t for Ada’s peeling laughter, he would’ve felt bad for the food they wasted. He could feel his socks wicking up the water, and hearing the maniacal screaming from other people who also go caught mingling with splashes.
They finally found shelter in a cafe, located in a square mere minutes away from the park. In the center of the cobblestoned sequester was a fountain, water pouring from the sleeves of Our Lady and into the basin below. Like all statues of her, her face was twisted in perpetual sorrow: blue eyes rimmed with red, either turned towards the Heavens to plead with her brothers and sisters about her tragedy or downturned to the closed-eyed face of her dead son, cradled in her hands; this particular statue had the latter. Behind her head was a halo of stars etched onto a dark-blue disk, a gift from the goddess so anyone from the island can find their way home again.
He can’t recall ever seeing her depicted with happiness. Whatever joy that she had left with her son, if he had to guess. Lady Reason of Errantia, at least, occasionally had an enigmatic smile - inspiring her people to pursue the unknowable. Ironically, it is unlikely that her people will know why they have not seen her in centuries.
Tomás dabbed his eyes with the dry interior of his windbreaker, its smooth fabric doing little to absorb anything. He opted instead to gently shake the water over the welcome mat of the cafe, twisting and squeezing it. When he turned back, Ada was holding a wad of paper towels. Droplets fell from her eyelashes, onto her rosy cheeks as she dried her forearms.
“When do you think the rain will stop?” She plastered her wet bangs back up and onto her scalp. She stared through the fogging window, watching the town’s street life dwindle as everyone sought shelter.
He opened the weather app on his phone, while also taking a paper towel from Ada’s stash to wipe the droplets from his eyelashes. “Says here it’s going to stop soon. It’s a passing storm.”
“Shame it couldn’t last longer. We haven’t had a good summer storm in so long.” She stretched an elastic band around her fingers. With deft movements, she put her hair up with a few turns of her wrist. “I can never get bored of the sight.”
Tomás gazed at her while she stared outside. “Neither will I.”
He put his hand onto the cold glass, about to idly trace their initials onto the surface: AF and TF.
As he traced their initials, there was a slight sloping to the surface, as if worn. It was directly beneath the pad of his finger. He initially attributed the anomaly to a simple imperfection in the glass, but as he continued tracing, he found that the intentions continued down exactly the path he intended. Once finished, he delicately trailed his fingers along the edge of his markings; the glass was perfectly smooth everywhere else.
Huh. That’s weird.
He brought his face closer to the window, squinted, and turned on the flashlight on his phone. Whatever whimsy from before slowly dissipated like their initials as his mind firmly set down his heart back into his chest. Imperfections like this happen all the time, he thought to himself. But it spoke to him. Call it an aspiring lawyer’s intuition, to let no stone go unturned lest you miss something.
He bent his knees, turning the flashlight option on his phone to see the rest of the imprint.
Ada peered quizzically at him above. He felt the curious gazes of the cafe customers also bore into him. “What are you doing?”
“I felt something on the glass.” He grimaced as he tilted his head and the light to try and get a better angle.
She squatted down with him, resting her chin on a closed fist, humming. “Could be an imperfection in the glass. The atoms aren’t completely immobile. They slowly shift. Maybe this glass wasn’t quite cooled close to its melting point and the atoms are moving faster than expected or a truly long time has passed since this panel was made… but if that were true then -”
“I think this imperfection is too deliberate,” he said suddenly.
Ada stared at him, her mouth slightly agape. “What?”
He blinked, also surprised by the certainty of his statement. He couldn’t tell you what compelled him to say it - only that he was ready to speak upon hearing Ada talk.
“I - I don’t know where that came from,” Tomás stuttered.
She pursed her lips. “I think it’s a mere imperfection. Oftentimes, the simplest solution is the correct one, although I do want to see for myself. Where is it?”
“Here.”
Before his senses caught up to his brain, he gently guided Ada’s finger to what he determined by contact to be the origin point of the indentations, if one wrote from left to right that is.
“What do you read?” he asked.
“Oh - let’s see. A…F.” She blinked. “My initials.”
“There’s more. Let’s jump a few centimeters more.” He moved her finger to the tip of the third letter in sequence. “What about here?”
Her eyes widened. “…Yours. And based on what my imagination filled in, they’re in your handwriting. Were you about to write out our initials on the pane? In this exact same spot?”
“Yes.”
“Do you think it’s a coincidence?”
“Nothing is ever a coincidence. There’s always a reason why something happened. You were right - these indentations aren’t some kind of natural process. It’s possible that they mean something different. Perhaps an inside joke on whoever made this?”
“It’d be a weird coincidence then.” She pressed her palms together. “You think the cafe might know something about this?”
“Are we playing detective now?”
“I might as well be one. My boss’s -
“- brother’s husband is one. Kind of.” He frowned briefly, before turning his attention back to the glass. His thoughts swam with wordless possibilities. He and Ada came to this cafe a few times in the past like…like…
When was the last time they came here?
He knew that they were here before and it was recent. He tried to think about what he did last week and strangely enough, he couldn’t remember much. He knew his life was boring, but there are usually a few memories which stick in recent memory. Everything before the start of the week was covered in a fog, as if it happened lifetimes ago. His memory couldn’t be that bad, right? In his corporate law class they were discussing about -
About -
…about…
Well, this week, they were discussing the complications of mergers and acquisitions as it applied to postal law; you see, it’s not as simple as changing the address. You must consider the company’s legal matters, what they are now providing with the nascent merger or what they are not providing anymore and adjust their status and package requirements accordingly… not only that but -
A slight jab to his side brought him back to reality. He blinked once, twice. Ada was staring outside, her gaze transfixed to seemingly nothing.
“Do you see it?” she whispered.
“See what?”
“There.” It was Ada’s turn to take control of his hands, pointing to an area above the ground, just above the red-and-white striped veranda across the street. “It’s a black dot.”
Tomás squinted, looking for it. The crepuscular rays leaking from the grey sky made it difficult to see. His eyes weren’t as good as Ada’s. She spent her days peering into the glaring lens of a microscope, looking for minute differences in her samples. It’s why she had to wear corrective contacts. It’s why he believed her when she said something was there.
It was almost imperceptible at first, like a passing dust particle in a beam of sunlight. He only caught sight of it when it became easier to notice. It was growing. Ever so steadily. It was only until it was the size of a fat grape - one that was nearly bursting out of its skin - that it started to garner attention. It was evident, then, that it wasn’t a perfect circle; space itself was torn and ragged at the edges.
Ada stared at it intently. Her expression was exactly the one she had on while she was working: studying inscrutable diagrams of chemical mechanisms, following each and every movement of an electron as it jumped across atoms. He was no scientist, but when holes appear in a company’s ledger, the best way to investigate the missing piece was to look in the information around it. It’s how you measure nothing.
All they could do was observe from behind the glass as the hole grew and grew. By now, it was about the size of a bowling ball. If the hole were to expand even more, continually, relentlessly, it could theoretically engulf this little street. Would it be satisfied? Or would it want more? What would happen if they were consumed?
A young man, someone around their age, boldly climbed up onto the rooftops. The people on the ground pointed their fingers at home. Shouts came from below: a mix of panicked caution and reckless encouragement. His hair was badly dyed blonde and his knees were scraped; Tomás instantly recognized him as one of the people who constantly skateboarded around campus, deftly weaving between crowds all the while sipping on an energy drink.
This same man stuck his finger into the hole, eliciting gasps from the crowds.
Tomás saw him make a move to pull it out.
It didn’t work.
He only had four fingers now, with the missing one a bloody stub and the offending finger half-suspended in the air. And he was screaming. People scrambled up the roofs to help him but what could they do? The damage was already done.
For the first time in a long time he made The Sign, crossing his middle finger over his pointer finger and put them over his heart, looking towards the fountain of Our Lady for reassurance and scrambling to remember her prayers - though his thoughts soon stuttered to a stop once he saw her face.
She was crying. Rivulets of tears streamed from her unblinking eyes. At first, he thought it was just droplets from the storm earlier, but the flow was constant, her tears gently dripping down her chin and into the basin.
It only took a few seconds for Tomás’s eyes to water as well and soon, everyone around him was overwhelmed with inconsolable sobbing.
For what they were crying for, they didn’t know, but for the first time, he understood Stella Maris’s sorrow.